Wellness, well enough?

What does wellness look like for you? Am I unwell? How can one be well enough?

I've found it to be super difficult to feel content on my pursuit of wellness. I don't know about you, the age of self-help, TikTok tutorials, and constant bombardment of wellness tips on social media has made my relationship with wellness rather complicated. There is always another product to help with this and that, another program, another bar to reach. I find myself feeling a bit confused because some folks seem to have wellness down so perfectly and effortlessly. I've also noticed that some wellness is "better" than others.

I have noticed that I tend to internalize and feel a bit of shame when I notice that my wellness seems to be someone else's health crisis or merely what it means to be "unwell".

I'd like to acknowledge that comparing myself to others has been a growth area across my lifespan. As we've seemingly transitioned out of the body positivity movement era (which was imperfect in itself), the pressure to look well has felt so intense. I say look well because it truly seems like an aesthetic more so than a genuine practice. Now don't get me wrong, I think wellness can help you appear well; however, there is a whole other end of the wellness spectrum that is not pretty.

In the last year, my mental health took a hit for several reasons. Healing from trauma, overcoming adversity, and attempting to find the energy to be well was and is super difficult for me. If my wellness journey is a store, it would likely be Hollister of the early 2000s: Dark, yet cool, a little eerie, costly, sometimes really fulfilling, but regardless of that, it's still just so dark. In the era of Lululemon, Drunk Elephant, and 11 year olds with 25-step skincare routines, it is so easy to feel unwell, even if you are well enough. This year I want to redefine wellness and be more comfortable in my journey.